Self-Doubt

There are few things worse than not believing or having faith in yourself. You are meant to be your own number one fan after all, and whether you like it or not everything you do is literally for you. But sometimes a little tiny seed of self-doubt will plant itself in the back of your mind and it's the pits.


For me, it starts with me being slightly unsure of something new. Maybe I've tried a new lipstick for the first time in ages, or wanting to experiment with something. Sometimes I get doubtful of myself when I think I'm asking too much of myself or when I'm feeling anxious. Either way, it's annoying, and you being in control of you, have the power to change your self-doubt around.

Recently I've been doubting myself over my blog, it's probably silly and I'm sure most bloggers at some point have their doubtful moments about their work. Afterall, when you're spending so much of your time working on something you want it to do well and to be proud of it. I often find that one bit of self-doubt sparks an avalanche of more self-doubt and then my mental health starts to suffer. I get more anxious and feel low much more than what's now normal for me. I'm starting to come out of my current phase of self-doubt so I thought I'd share some tips that have helped me along the way.


Let's be honest, self-doubt more often than not will start with comparison. And so the first step in dealing with self-doubt, and seemingly most difficult, is to stop comparing yourself to others. So much of our self-doubt comes from us not thinking that we're good enough. You'll see people who you think are better at doing what you do, you'll see girls with figures you dream of having and without even realising it you've set yourself up in a competition that no one really asked to be in. Instead of wishing you could take photographs like the ones on your favourite Instagram account or you could be daring enough to wear bright lipstick, just try it. I have to admit that this is where I struggle, if you've compared yourself to someone else and you're doubting yourself it can be difficult to take the plunge and try something, but 9 times out of 10 it'll be worth it.

Next, I'd recommend swapping the comparisons for positive affirmations. Now bare with me, I know this might sound a little cringe or too 'self-helpy' but honestly it can work. Next time you doubt that you can achieve what you want to achieve because there's someone who's achieved more in less time, remind yourself of what you've done. Instead of making a comparison that puts you down, and plants self-doubt in your mind, focus on the positives.


If you suffer from a mental illness then you may find that you start doubting yourself much more frequently. Of course, your doubt may seem like truth when you're suffering, but self-doubt is simply that. It's your own uncertainty, but the people around you will be able to see that and be able to bring you back to earth and remind you of everything you've achieved and what you're amazing at. So what you can't dance in heels, it doesn't matter that you haven't perfected that Instagram flatlay or that your eyeliner doesn't match. What matters is that you are you, and you are capable of amazing things.

Sometimes it can be as simple as just taking a step back, and realising that you are more than your self-doubt. Something I've been struggling with recently is adjusting to a new body shape after weight loss. When I shop for clothes I still envisage myself to be a size and shape that I just wasn't happy with, and so when I try on new styles of clothes I previously would've overlooked, it's hard to admit that I've changed and that actually I can feel confident and not doubtful about myself in different clothes. In terms of my doubt with my blog, turns out that whilst I have a million beauty related post ideas, I just can't get a photo I'm happy with whilst I'm comparing my photography to someone else's, but that doesn't mean that I should stop blogging completely. Taking a step back and assessing the situation can be challenging when you're full of doubt, but actually it does work.

Self-doubt is horrible, it makes you feel awful and like you're worth nothing. But by reminding yourself not to put yourself into competition wth anyone else, however hard it is, and to see that what you're doing/wearing/achieving is amazing, it is possible to push past the self-doubt. The dangerous thing with comparison is that you're comparing where you are now to where they are now, without knowing about what they went through to get there, or acknowledging what you went through to get where you are. Don't let comparisons steal your happiness and plant self-doubt in your mind. You are wonderful as you are.


How do you deal with self-doubt?



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